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내가 일본에 건너가서 초반기에 가장 많이 꾼 꿈이 보석 반지와 아찔할 만큼 높은 하늘을 날아오르는 것이었다.

이 힘겨운 유학생활만 잘 견디면 보석이 의미하는 경제력과 하늘이 의미하는 신분상승이 이루어지리라 믿어 의심치 않았다.또한 이 꿈들은 절대적인 그 누군가가 미리 암시해주는 거라 너무도 당연히 믿어버렸다. 그때 나는 꿈이 너무 많았고,조금 어렸으며,삶이 이리도 어려울거라는 걸 알지 못했다.

일본에서 처음으로 회사생활을 시작하면서 난생처음으로 꿈이 무너지는 소리를 들었다. 만만치 않음을 산 넘어 산이 매번 나타난다는 것을 그 때부터 지금까지 난 절감하면서 산다.

어느 날 꿈풀이 책과 정신과 의사가 쓴 인문과학서를 읽게 되었다.

내가 그 동안 믿어왔던 신의 암시는 간절한 나의 소망이 꿈이라는 화면을 통해 방영되었던것이라는 결론을 내렸다.

좀 슬프지만 .....그 책을 읽지 말았어야 했다.

일본에 도착해서 처음 맞이하는 초 여름의 새벽녘....난 또 꿈을 꾸고 만다.
홈지기가 오른 쪽 약지 손가락에 낀 보석반지를내게 건내주었다.

굵은 보석이 박힌 두서너 돈은 됨직한 금반지이다. 그 당시 홈지기와 난 몇 마디 나눠보지 못한 사이였기에,의아해하던 기억이 난다.

하지만 홈지기와 나는 평생을 같이 늙어갈 선 ,후배이자 절 친한 친구가 돼었다. 그 꿈을 꾸던 그 당시만 해도 전혀 예측하지 못햇던 일이었다.

어쩜 그 꿈들이 진짜로 신의 암시였을지도 모른다는 택도 없는 기대를 해본다.


    


  
승희  :  와 언니도 그런 꿈 꿨었군요.
저도 얼마전에 반지를 받는 꿈을 꿨답니다.
아~ 참! 전 송아 언니 세번째 동생입니다. 인사드립니다. ^^
그거 시집 가는 꿈이라는데요. ^^
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